Friday, September 08, 2006

"Siapa Nak Kerja?"

Had a rather surprisingly delightful evening (with a tone of writing that suggests my mind has affinities for the former management of these lands, but alas, lacking tea and crumpets) yesterday. We had a little do-dah in town playing for some event called Art Beat, with all sorts of arts stalls and events - played a viola duo and then jammed with a country band. For a while it seemed like Adelaide, without the monarch.
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Anyhoo, the faculty and three students who went for the show adjurned to a restaurant called The Great Wall. And yes, everyone asks me, "Of China?" Anyway, it had better choices of food than choices in names, shall we say. Part of the conversation went round operatic faux pas and the like, and there was this theme of how you have to make do with whatever happens on stage - an example being the legendary Maria Callas reaching behind her for her stage dagger, and finding nothing but a banana, had no choice but to attempt killing the tenor with it. I'm still trying to find a more detailed account online, but Googling "Maria Callas kill banana" is so far only producing methods of using contraceptives. Hmm.
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Now, I don't usually read, let alone forward e-mail forwards, but I did find one particularly interesting, and include it below. 'Till next time, mates, cheerio.
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Immediate Vacancies

We are a local thieves gang specializing in snatching handbags in Klang Valley and Johor Bahru. We are seeking money-orientated and result-driven professionals to join our team. Successful candidates can expect excellent money and attractive fringe benefits. We are now seeking highly motivated team players to join our force in our recent expansion.
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Snatch Thieves( Klang Valley and Johor Bahru)

Responsibilities:
• To snatch women handbags on the street.
Requirements:
• Candidate must at least a drug addict, jobless bum, mat rempit or equivalent.
• At least 1 - 2 year(s) of crime experience in Malaysia (other countries may be considered)
• Applicants must be aggressive, daring, outgoing, and adventurous personality.
• Motivated and able to work independently, not necessarily a team player.
• Able to snatch things at fast pace and poses excellent motorcycle driving skills.
• Good command of vulgarity in spoken & written English, Bahasa Melayu, and Chinese dialect would be advantageous.
• Applicants must be willing to work in designated places, travel outstation & possess own transport (motorcycle).
• Applicants can be Malaysian citizens or illegal immigrant; jobless fresh graduates are also welcomed.
• Full-Time positions available.
Apply before 31st December 2006.

1 comment:

stev said...

> Googling "Maria Callas kill banana" is so far only producing methods of using contraceptives. Hmm.

LOL

received the Forward on the (fake) Jobstreet Immediate Vacancies ad as well here

was quite hilarious